Nov. 7th, 2011 01:18 pm
sabrinamari: (ecstatic planet)
Feeling the love 'cause someone I care about just told a whole slew of awesome women how much I've helped and supported her. Glowing. Just glowing.
sabrinamari: (Surviving HIV/AIDS)
The New Jersey Women and AIDS Network (NJWAN) Annual Conference:

Confronting the Crisis 2011: Women and HIV Conference


I have a morning workshop slot. I'm excitedly figuring out how to get maximal audience participation rolling.

Then talking at Hunter College that evening, in a colleague's class. It should be fun!
sabrinamari: (graveyard 1)
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I want to know what I'm going to do *here*.
sabrinamari: (Godhooks/Transformation)
One of the many people currently helping me grow pointed me to a set of brilliant blog posts (thank you, honey).

If you're wondering how to shift your life in some significant way, and it feels *way* beyond your reach, please consider reading them. Even if you're simply aware of a gap between where you are now and where you want be, these posts are well worth exploring.

I love the way this guy pulls the fangs of potentially off-putting New Age language, breaking down his terms and explaining exactly what he means with clear examples and simple words.

I also love his list of 22 action steps near the end of the second post. I looked at these and said, "Damn, I do almost all of these things, many of them on a daily basis...oh yeah, that's why the universe sends me what I need and want so easily. 1-4 are my absolute favorites! OK, this guy has really laid out the process so people can see."

It's kind of eerie, how closely this man's descriptions map to my understanding of the world and how to move in it. He even articulates the idea that people are antennas, which is an important, deeply held belief I've had for years, but have only really spoken aloud in the last twelve months or so.


Wanna shift? Go here and let this guy explain exactly how he does it. Stick out the first post and get to the second: it's even more useful than the first.


EDIT: There's another, really, really important thing: it takes time to adjust your vibe and/or learn new things, so as you are learning, you'll need to be very patient with yourself.

I know that I need to see something and/or do it three or four times, at least, before I've really started to get it down. When learning (or teaching) something new, offering patience and engaging in repetition is really, really important.

Give yourself the time you need to absorb new patterns of being. When you get frustrated, remember that you *will* learn the new vibe/pattern, and put down the stick you're using to beat yourself up.
sabrinamari: (Default)
This fall I've been doing some coaching/writing work with a friend who's wrapping up her diss and a co-worker struggling with an undergrad writing class. I came back to great news on both fronts this morning. My friend turned in her last draft, and my co-worker got a paper grade so high that she's been exempted from taking the final.

Sweet! Love their triumphs.
sabrinamari: (Life of Joy)
This morning, I woke up thinking about my focus. Most of the time, I focus on whatever is immediately around me. If I have a good day at work, I focus on the day's successes and I feel good. It's easy to build on that happy feeling and push forward towards something else I want----something that also feels good.

But if I have a bad day, or something happens that's frustrating or sad, it's easy to focus on that as well. Then one thing tends to build on another as I obsess, and I feel worse and worse.

For most of us, it's unusual to break the cycle or step in and take command of this unconscious process. But we are creative beings: we bring new works of art to life all the time. Yet why do we so rarely look at our own lives as the art that matters?

Just as I create a workshop or a class, so too can I create huge parts of my own life. If I so choose, I can spend some time every day exploring the previously unimagined possibilities that exist before me. Do I want to live here or somewhere else? Do I want to learn a new hobby? Can I imagine myself skydiving, sculpting or salsa dancing?

Most of the time, we don't even try to use our imaginations to explore all the amazing possibilities that could open up our lives. Most of the time, we stay firmly, doggedly focused on whatever is---especially of we don't like it.

But how can we experience anything new if we can't even imagine it? Experience follows focus. Most of the time, we end up doing whatever we think about doing the most, and we end up (re) experiencing whatever we obsess about the most.

I've often thought that the Buddhist practice of mindfulness meditation is a good one. It is important to truly experience what is.

But it is also important to open up to new thoughts and new possibilities, especially if they can guide us where we might want to go.

Here's your challenge for the day: find a new focus. If something frustrates you, acknowledge that fact, take a deep breath, and let it go. Instead of obsessing, use your creative power to imagine something different. Ask yourself---what else would I really like to explore? Where else would I like my life to go? Then for three or four minutes, let your imagination roll. Allow it to unfold new possibilities, new ideas and new directions to explore.

After all, your life usually follows your focus. Why not focus on something new, something strong and something good?
sabrinamari: (Default)
Several weeks ago I posted an exercise designed to move you towards the career/apartment/house that you most desire. That exercise asked you to write out the "story" of a day in your ideal job, or the day that you found your perfect new house/new apartment.

The link to that post is here: http://sabrinamari.livejournal.com/504893.html

Now for Part 2:

First, pull up or pull out your story and think about what happened next.

Once the vision crystallized on the page, how did it infiltrate your life? Did you decide on a new course of action? Did you start walking in a new direction? What did you do differently, once your attention was focused on what you most wanted?

Even if you didn't actually write out your story, did you begin to visualize a new and different path? Check under the cut for your next move.

Read more... )

If you thought about doing this exercise, but felt too uncomfortable/busy/stressed out to do it, now is the time to ask yourself what's going on.

Why would you say that you want something and then refuse to create a vision of it?

Could it be that the forces that push you towards your vision are matched by equal and opposite forces holding you back?

If this is the case, you may feel stressed and sad as you think about your vision. You may want it, but feel hopeless about ever getting it. It may even be too uncomfortable to actually think about!

However, think about this: you are guaranteed never to live out your vision if you won't imagine it, feel it or begin moving towards it.

If this is you, and you are unsatisfied with what you have right now, ask yourself if you are at least willing to look more closely at your paralysis. A good way to do this is to give voice to each opposing part of yourself. Here's how:

Read more... )
Next week: Part 3
sabrinamari: (Life of Joy)
"Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care for people will hear them and be influenced by them for good or ill." Buddha


Introducing Your Children to Money

Most probably, you’ll pass on your deepest beliefs to your children. This is most likely to happen with ideas that are so basic and important that you don’t even notice them. Your children will absorb your perspective on the world and accept it as reality, at least during their younger years. This means that you’ll also pass on your relationship to Element Money. In this episode, Sabrina Mari explores exactly what this means and encourages you to take a long, hard look at what you are teaching the ones you love.


We've changed the web address slightly, so if you've subscribed, you'll need to go directly to the site and resubscribe.

I am still working on the resource pages referred to in the podcast. My General Resources page is up and my Element Money resource page will up soon---as in a matter of days. I will add to both pages on ongoing basis.

Active website construction is happening now at www.sabrinamari.net (thank you, [livejournal.com profile] mage_imbroglio). If you think of something you'd like to see there, please let me know.
sabrinamari: (Default)
One of my most respected role models, Pema Chodron, speaks here about one of the critical roles of the Priest/Priestess/teacher, or, as she terms it, "spiritual friend".

I think her perspective also describes the work of spiritually inclined coaches. When coaches are good, they don't support you in your comfortable (lazy) view of the world. They don't help you relax into the life you've settled for.

A good coach is a friend to your long-term happiness, not your present day weaknesses. A good coach, Priest/ess or minister doesn't hesitate to push your buttons, your boundaries or your worldview---while still treating you like an intelligent adult deserving of respect. A good coach cares more about your personal growth than any praise you might offer him or her.

A good coach appreciates and uses productive discomfort. S/he takes pleasure in pushing you just past your comfort zone, while remaining careful to stay within the bounds of respectful behavior.

A good coach respects your strength more than your weakness. S/he asks you to take responsibility for yourself. A good coach wants you to fly instead of walk and believes that you are fully capable of doing so.

A good coach will frequently piss you off.

sabrinamari: (Golden Buddha)
[livejournal.com profile] vgnwtch wrote,

"I keep going back to the Clay Buddha story: monks have golden statue of Buddha; monks get wind of an attack; monks cover golden Buddha with clay to make it look like a worthless statue; war rages and monks forget the golden Buddha's in there; generations pass and monks revere clay statue because their predecessors did; someone moves the statue and drops it by mistake; clay falls off to reveal... GOLDEN BUDDHA! I want that story to be the basis of how I and others treat ourselves, each other and our clients. No matter how much shit is on the outside, somewhere deep inside is a GOLDEN BUDDHA!, and it doesn't matter how small that is or how deeply it's buried. It's in there somewhere, and it needs to be recognised. Doesn't mean we have to like the clay or disregard the clay or just pretend it's not there in order to show how virtuous we are; sometimes that clay is toxic. In the therapy room, though, it's important to remember that the clay's the way in to the valuable individual in front of us. Or the individual we are.

I love envisaging the clay drying out and dropping off me so that I shine in the sunlight. Sometimes it's far thicker than others. It's always a relief."

This is so perfectly descriptive of the work I'm doing with myself and others that I'm adopting it as my new battle cry:

sabrinamari: (Default)
"Love is the capacity to take care, to protect, to nourish. If you are not capable of generating that kind of energy toward yourself- if you are not capable of taking care of yourself, of nourishing yourself, of protecting yourself- it is very difficult to take care of another person. In the Buddhist teaching, it's clear that to love oneself is the foundation of the love of other people. Love is a practice. Love is truly a practice."

~Thich Nhat Hanh

For me, self-love is not merely self-acceptance or self-esteem. It means that I make sure that I eat well, get enough exercise, and make enough to pay my own bills and take care of my own material needs when it is reasonable to do so.

I am worthy of decent health insurance, good primary and specialty care, a healthy savings account, and a set of career tracks that I love. I am worthy of an income that gives me the ability to save enough for my own retirement, with money left over for the things that bring me sheer joy. I return some of what I receive to those who have less, and I do it with delight.

This does not mean that I always have to make money, no matter what. Sometimes that's just not possible, and that's OK. However, it does mean that my intentions towards myself are strongly positive. When I can do so without severe physical or emotional consequences, I prioritize my own material well-being with gratitude for this marvelous opportunity to thrive.
sabrinamari: (Default)
Read more... )

Part 2 will be posted in about two weeks.

For those of you looking to move into a place that suits you better: instead of writing a description of your perfect work day, write out a description of your perfect new home. Where is it? What does it look it look like, smell like? Who are your roommates? How much is the rent?

Write a description of how you found it. Where did you go about looking for it? What happened when you met your landlord or the person who showed it to you? What did you love most about it as you walked through it and looked at each of the rooms? How did you know this was the place you were looking for?

What, if anything, is challenging about it?

Once your description is written, follow the instructions above.

More next week.

EDIT: If you really want to move, start culling your possessions immediately. Ever day or two, go through some of your belongings and get rid of what you no longer need. Then start packing. If you want something new, you have to start letting go of what you already have. You have to start making room.
sabrinamari: (Godhooks)
I am now part of a collective called Godhooks that emerged from the belief that all humans are born with the potential to reimagine themselves at will.

As individuals with the capacity to grow and change, we don't have to stay trapped by pain, trauma or our own past choices. It is our birthright to learn from where we are, no matter where that it is, and to use this knowledge to create lives of joy.

The members of Godhooks work together to bring individuals and communities the opportunity, support and safe space in which to embrace transformative change. We love what we do, and what we do is help people reconnect to the Divine and their own inner wisdom.

We'll be presenting at five gatherings this year. We'll also be offering weekend workshops of our own that guide small groups through an intensive process of change. When you leave our workshops, the world will have opened up before you and your feet will be planted firmly on the path forward. This will happen not because of who we are, but because of who you are.

Change is coming.


sabrinamari: (Default)
People deal too much with the negative, with what is wrong. Why not try and see positive things, to just touch those things and make them bloom?

~Thich Nhat Hanh
sabrinamari: (Default)
In April of 2008, I asked my LJ friends to spill their personal mission statements. I've listed them below, and I must ask you: "Do they still apply today? Would you change it? If so, how?"

New friends with new answers are welcome to respond, too.

[livejournal.com profile] vgnwtch: "Make tea, not war.

[livejournal.com profile] catpaw67: ""I am here to live aloud," and/or "I hold the space."

[livejournal.com profile] rainbear: *This space intentionally left blank* and/or ".*" and/or "*"

[livejournal.com profile] elphaba_of_oz: "I shine a light on it."

[livejournal.com profile] lady_daegonna: "Live and love."

[livejournal.com profile] siriciryon: "I protect and repair everything I can. Being loved is needful bonus."

[livejournal.com profile] justusgirlz: "To promote, and live, a life of pleasure and beauty."

[livejournal.com profile] spiffnolee: "I help others find the Divine."

Mine: "I am an agent of transformation and change."
sabrinamari: (Stretching/New (fire) priestess work)
This morning I remind myself:

There are no emergencies, only the things you choose to do, all lined up for your pleasure. Your goal is to create your life. What will you create today? You, the artist, can paint whatever you wish in the way that you wish---only the choices of others are beyond your control.

What will you add to your life today? How will you shape your destiny? What will you call to yourself?

There are no emergencies, only the painting you create. Do not forget that you chose it. Do not forget that you change it. Do not forget that you are the agent, not the victim. Your will guides and shapes each element.

What will you paint today?

My answer:

Today I will paint a re-imagined health care system. I will articulate the needs and wants of those whose voices are seldom heard. Today, I will take one more step towards transforming my world.
sabrinamari: (Water priestess)
"Deep understanding can only be achieved by going oneself through the journey of discovery and invention. Someone else's story of the journey will always be a pale imitation of the experience."


This is why all my workshops will be based on experiential exercises, and why I specialize in creating and managing rites of passage. There is no substitute for direct experience.
sabrinamari: (Things can go pear-shaped...)
If you are frustrated and angry about your money and/or career situation, and you want to do something practical about it, you can always choose to enter a "Money Neophyte" process, modeled on Blue Star's Initiate training process. Here's how to get started:

General Principles:

Excavate all your attitudes about work, money and how you relate to them, and question them all.
Read more... )
Practical Strategies:

1. Look for podcasts - one I like is "48 Days to the Work You Love". It is geared towards entrepreneurs, but every show has gems.
Read more... )
Anyone who wants to add to this list: please chime in.
sabrinamari: (Stretching/New (fire) priestess work)

How do you decide whether you have enough money, and what constitutes enough? In this podcast, Sabrinamari talks about the connection between your relationship with Element Money and your ministry---the work you were born to do in this life.


Those of you who have subscribed to this series of classes will need to delete your subscription and resubscribe, as we have changed my domain. Podcasts are still located at sabrinamari.net, however.
sabrinamari: (Stretching/New (fire) priestess work)
Yesterday was spent mourning, and I really, really appreciate all the help and comfort that you sent me. Thank you. I needed to listen to my feelings and let them flow as they were. Now, I feel more open and ready to work. Thank you, all of you, for the strategies you offered me. I am stealing them to help me release this lovely house in a positive way.

I also woke up ruminating on my FSG and Beltane workshops. I have tremendous energy this morning to think about them and plan, plan, plan...


At the Beltane pre-conference, I want to focus intensively on each participant, as individuals (Where are they now? What has their history has helped them to shape/What CAN they offer each other...and what DO they actually offer?) and as couples (How do they "fit" together and where can they go next? How can their intimate partnership jump start their magical partnerships?). I have many tools, ideas and desires, and will need to fit them into the times given...

[You can read the description of "Forging Magical Partnerships: Strengthening the Bonds of Intimacy and Love" here: http://www.freespiritgathering.org/beltane/forging.html]

Read more... )


sabrinamari: (Default)

June 2012

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