Coaches and Teachers Are Trouble, Man!

[sabrinamari]

One of my most respected role models, Pema Chodron, speaks here about one of the critical roles of the Priest/Priestess/teacher, or, as she terms it, "spiritual friend".

I think her perspective also describes the work of spiritually inclined coaches. When coaches are good, they don't support you in your comfortable (lazy) view of the world. They don't help you relax into the life you've settled for.

A good coach is a friend to your long-term happiness, not your present day weaknesses. A good coach, Priest/ess or minister doesn't hesitate to push your buttons, your boundaries or your worldview---while still treating you like an intelligent adult deserving of respect. A good coach cares more about your personal growth than any praise you might offer him or her.

A good coach appreciates and uses productive discomfort. S/he takes pleasure in pushing you just past your comfort zone, while remaining careful to stay within the bounds of respectful behavior.

A good coach respects your strength more than your weakness. S/he asks you to take responsibility for yourself. A good coach wants you to fly instead of walk and believes that you are fully capable of doing so.

A good coach will frequently piss you off.

Comments

[radiant-one.livejournal.com]

I watched this yesterday after our chat. Thank you for posting it!

Life as Teacher

[ingridsummers.livejournal.com]

I loved that lecture. It illuminates my other post perhaps. It seems life is being my teacher by bringing up all the various ways my ego gets "hooked" into be "right and valued and important". Non of which, of course, have anything to do with how right, valued or important I am or even whether or not I want to be right, valued or important in that particular instance.

Because, I do want to know what I'm doing and be valued for it and have an important role in my work in the world. The key phrase, of course is "my work in the world". If it's not my work, I don't need to be the boss. Yummmmm. I'm feeling all purring and warm. Thanks.

[hypatia42.livejournal.com]

Recently being called out for making people uncomfortable, pushing buttons, and insisting that people see their strengths instead of weaknesses. I've been trying to come to grips with the expression of this, which felt very much like a criticism at the time.

Hearing this helps.