Risks and Rewards
Jun. 18th, 2008 04:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sabrinamariToday I sat down with a co-worker with whom I've been feeling tension for months now. I care about her, so the unexplained stress in our relationship has been troubling me, and it's made the general coolness at work more difficult to manage.
I walked into her office and asked if she had a few minutes. When she said yes, I closed the door and explained that I had seen a change in her body language over the past few months. I gave her a few examples, then asked if she would just tell me what she was experiencing. I told her that I wouldn't do or say anything; I'd just listen to her and try to understand what she was feeling.
To be honest, I thought this attempt would fail. The most likely outcome was that she would either brush me off or tell me she was too busy for an intense conversation. Still, I wanted the peace that comes with doing everything possible to clarify and heal disjuncture.
To my surprise, she opened up and we talked for about 20 minutes. By the end of the conversation, I understood her perspective and she understood mine. This was more than I had hoped for. Unexpectedly, we ended up affirming our friendship and the good will we carry towards each other.
It was good. I feel like a huge burden has been lifted off of my shoulders.
This reminds me that risks can pay off, and courage is often rewarded.
I walked into her office and asked if she had a few minutes. When she said yes, I closed the door and explained that I had seen a change in her body language over the past few months. I gave her a few examples, then asked if she would just tell me what she was experiencing. I told her that I wouldn't do or say anything; I'd just listen to her and try to understand what she was feeling.
To be honest, I thought this attempt would fail. The most likely outcome was that she would either brush me off or tell me she was too busy for an intense conversation. Still, I wanted the peace that comes with doing everything possible to clarify and heal disjuncture.
To my surprise, she opened up and we talked for about 20 minutes. By the end of the conversation, I understood her perspective and she understood mine. This was more than I had hoped for. Unexpectedly, we ended up affirming our friendship and the good will we carry towards each other.
It was good. I feel like a huge burden has been lifted off of my shoulders.
This reminds me that risks can pay off, and courage is often rewarded.
