A really useful post

[sabrinamari]

Today I remembered a post that once struck me as very important. It was written by someone I don't know at all; I found it only through an acquaintance's journal.

I probably remembered it today because I've been thinking about my ex, but it's useful for people grappling with all kinds of dysfunctional systems.

It's called "How to Keep Someone with You Forever".

http://issendai.livejournal.com/572510.html

Comments

[the-smith-e.livejournal.com]

Thank you for posting this out.

[sabrinamari.livejournal.com]

Momentarily depressing, but very, very useful.

[sabrinamari.livejournal.com]

Especially useful for me were reminders of a few things we all learned in basic psych: the tremendous manipulative power of intermittent rewards and how easy it is for most people to fall for gaslighting (defined here: http://www.runboard.com/bnarcissisticabuserecovery.f9.t5318).

I now know to run when I see either.

[akrissy.livejournal.com]

*small quiet voice* whoa

I want to digest this one for a while.

also, gaslighting - usually not so obvious as the example in the article IMHO.

[sabrinamari.livejournal.com]

True. It's much more subtle and way more effective when employed by the extremely intelligent.

[zammis.livejournal.com]

This is so deep- and so what my experience at Big Internet Company was like.

I also might be doing this to myself a bit in the new career. oy.

Need to re-read this a few times and make notes.

[showingup.livejournal.com]

It fascinates me that we can see this in our personal relationships and jobs, and yet when it's related to our social status quo, a lot of people get very defensive and angry.

Useful link

[sean hoffman (from livejournal.com)]

Thanks for this, this sums up so much dysfunction so neatly!

Re: Useful link

[sabrinamari.livejournal.com]

Happy to see you here.

[diekonigin.livejournal.com]

Thank you SO much. This spoke volumes to me, and I'm passing it on to someone else who could use it as well.